Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Prepare the Sacrifice! (…wait, what?)

Miss Melody tagged me for what at first appeared to be rather an odd questionnaire, especially for book-lovers. It makes more sense as you read through it, though because it gives us a chance to rant about books we aren’t too fond of (or downright hate), and would be happy to sacrifice at need. A bit twisted, but fun.
So here we go….

#1: An Over-Hyped Book
Situation: You are in a bookstore when the zombies attack.  Over the loudspeakers you hear the military announce that over-hyped books are the zombies' only weakness.  What over-hyped book will you chuck at the zombies?

This is hard, because I haven’t actually read any of the books people are raving about these days. Just knowing what the themes of the books are turned me off. But I’m going to join Melody and Dessa and heave every stinkin’ copy of Twilight at the zombies anyhow.
This quote pretty much sums up my feelings for this series. :-P

#2: A Sequel
Situation: You are caught in a torrential downpour and you're probably the type who melts when you get wet.  What sequel are you willing to use as an umbrella to protect yourself.

Well, not exactly *melt* but I do hate getting wet (hello, ugly straight bangs…). As for what book I’d use as an umbrella without shedding a tear…I’d have to say Rilla of Ingleside by L.M. Montgomery. I tried to read this again several years ago, but just couldn’t get into it. I was miffed at Anne for talking like Rilla’s not wanting to go to college as a bad thing. I was more turned off by Rilla’s all-fired hurry to grow up. She didn’t have the charm and imaginative quality that Anne had throughout most of the series, and of course a lot of the book deals with WWI, and I hate war stories. Oh my gosh, poor Walter….
So yeah. Eat rain, Rilla.

#3: A Classic
Situation: You're in English class and your professor won't stop going on about a classic that "revolutionized literature".  Personally you think the classic is garbage and you decide to express your opinion by hurling the book at his head.  What classic is that?

Stepping Heavenward by Mrs. E. Prentiss.
*Ducks under Everything-proof Shield*
I hate this book. I’ve seen this lauded as an excellent example of Christian womanhood in Christian book magazines and what-not, but I honestly don’t know why. I tried twice to read it—once at sixteen, once as an adult. Couldn’t finish it either time because I was so disgusted. At first, I felt sorry for Catherine, because her mother didn’t understand her, and her father (who did understand her) up and died, then she was railroaded into marrying a man she didn’t like….
When I read it again, I saw things from the mother’s perspective, and found Catherine to be a willful, petulant little…*shrew*. Then I ploughed through the rest of the book, where she has to deal with her unpleasant relatives, her mother dies, she’s worried about her delicate little girl—but it’s her strong, healthy boy who keels over (EXCUSE ME?)—but the last straw was when her brother, who just got engaged to be married and was all set to go to India as a missionary…yeah, he dies, too. Just like that. It’s like the author sat around and thought to herself, “Who can I kill off next?”
A little conflict is fine, but this was just too much, and seemed so arbitrary. AURGH.

#4: A Least Favorite Book
Situation: You're hanging out at a bookstore (where else would you be?) when global warming somehow manages to turn the whole world into a frozen wasteland.  Naturally, your only hope of survival is to burn a book.  Which book would you not regret tossing into the fire?

Wait—global warming causes the world to become a frozen wasteland?? O.o Anyhoo….
While I’ve never actually read the Harry Potter series (which my Bro dubbed “Hairy Potsmoke,” LOL), just looking at anything related to them gives me the creeps. Actually, I did read a bit of’s review here…only a bit because I was so disgusted with the pagan overtones and undercurrents just in the short snippets they featured (“sacrificial goddess magic”? Someone’s blood has magical powers? Ew…). So, yeah, I’d be happy to toss this witches’ brew in the flames.

#5: A Series
Situation: There's a flooded stream you have to cross on your quest and you can't get your feet wet.  Which series (oh yeah, btw, you brought your whole bookshelf and also probably local library with you) will you use as stepping stones?

Any of the last three books in the When Calls the Heart series by Janette Oke. The first two were pretty good, but the series just got more frustrating as it went along. So many potential plots glossed over. So many opportunities wasted. Such shallow. Very disappoint. Much ugh.

Runner-up would be the Emily Books by L.M. Montgomery. So little love, virtually no character development, and there are some pretty strange ideas featured (reincarnation and Emily’s being “psychic” among them). Bleh.

I tag Kendra.
...and anyone else who wants to participate.

 God bless,

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